Archive for the ‘M’ Category

Love Installation

Friday, December 18th, 2009

A step by step guide to installing love on the human machine.

Customer: I can do that. I’m not very technical, but I think I am ready to install now. What do I do first?

Tech Support: The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your HEART ma’am?

Customer: Yes I have, but there are several programs running right now. Is it okay to install while they are running?

Tech Support: What programs are running ma’am?

Customer: Let me see… I have PASTHURT.EXE, LOWESTEEM.EXE, GRUDGE.EXE, and RESENTMENT.COM running right now.

Tech Support: No problem. LOVE will automatically erase PASTHURT.EXE from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory, but it will no longer disrupt other programs. LOVE will eventually overwrite LOWESTEEM.EXE with a module of its own called HIGHESTEEM.EXE However,you have to completely turn off GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM. Those programs prevent LOVE from being properly installed. Can you turn those off ma’am?

Customer: I don’t know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

Tech Support: My pleasure. Go to your Start menu and invoke FORGIVENESS.EXE. Do this as many times as necessary until GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, I’m done. LOVE has started installing itself automatically. Is that normal?

Tech Support: Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it will reinstall for the life of your HEART. Do you see that message?

Customer: Yes I do. Is it completely installed?

Tech Support: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to begin connecting to other HEARTS in order to get the upgrades.

Customer: Oops…I have an error message already. What should I do?

Tech Support: What does the message say?

Customer: It says “ERROR 412 – PROGRAM NOT RUN ON INTERNAL COMPONENTS”. What does that mean?

Tech Support: Don’t worry ma’am, that’s a common problem. It means that the LOVE program is set up to run on external HEARTS but has not yet been run on your HEART. It is one of those complicated programming things, but in non-technical terms it means – “you have to ‘LOVE’ your own machine before it can “LOVE” others.”

Customer: So what should I do?

Tech Support: Can you find the directory called “SELF-ACCEPTANCE”?

Customer: Yes, I have it.

Tech Support: Excellent, you are getting good at this.

Customer: Thank you.

Tech Support : You’re welcome. Click on the following files and then copy them to the “MYHEART” directory: FORGIVESELF.DOC, SELFESTEEM.TXT, REALIZEWORTH.TXT, and GOODNESS.DOC. The system will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching any faulty programming. Also, you need to delete SELFCRITIC.EXE from all directories, and then empty your recycle bin afterwards to make sure it is completely gone and never comes back.

Customer: Got it. Hey! My HEART is filling up with really neat files. SMILE.MPG is playing on my monitor right now and it shows that WARMTH.COM, PEACE.EXE, and CONTENTMENT.COM are copying themselves all over my HEART!

Tech Support: Then LOVE is installed and running. You should be able to handle it from here. One more thing before I go

Customer: Yes?

Tech Support: LOVE is freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules to everybody you meet. They will in turn share it with other people and they will return some really neat modules back to you.

Customer: I will. Thank you for your help.

Sources:

Mistakes are Painful

Tuesday, January 1st, 2008

Mistakes are painful when they happen. But years later, a collection of mistakes is called Experience which leads you to success.

It Feels So Sad To Miss Someone Badly

Friday, September 28th, 2007

It feels sad to miss someone badly, specially when both of you shared an unforgettable relationship.
It’s so sad not to feel the presence of that someone.
It burns your heart with such sadness and longing.
With all that burden you’re going through.
You thought your someone also misses you.
But only to find out that the someone you knew was enjoying time without you.

You Can Never Teach

Wednesday, September 26th, 2007

You can never teach a guy to love you, the way you want to be loved.
You have to wait for him to do it, in his own way, in his own time.

That’s the saddest part of being a girl.

But you can never teach a girl to love the guy back, the way she did before.
If she already grew tired…
Fed up understanding…
Waiting to be appreciated…
And loved the way she deserves to be loved.

That’s the saddest part of being an insensitive man.

It’s the Silence

Sunday, September 23rd, 2007

It’s the silence that tells it all.
Sometimes its not about the yelling and the tears.
All it takes is for two people to sit beside each other and feel that something is wrong.
That what was there before isn’t there anymore.
That they’re miserable when they’re apart, but they’re much worse when they’re together.
And that there’s only two options left…


Either they sit still and ignore the pain…
or one of them gathers enough courage to stand up and walk away.

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